For those of you who I asked advice about whether to go to Tanzania as a private midwife, I have decided not to go. There were a number of reasons why I decided this, not least that next year I will be concluding my PhD research. I have been reflecting on why this decision has been hard to come to and I think a lot has been due to my own feelings about midwifery. Normally a decision like this is very easy for me: I either plunge on ahead as happy as a lark or I dismiss it as yet another of my mad schemes (which I am full of, as many of my friends will tell you). However, this time, I have been in a real quandary.
I am taking a break from being a practicing midwife at the moment to concentrate on my studies. I also very badly hurt my back at a birth a couple of years ago, so I am thinking of how I can fulfill the requirements of having a Midwifery Council of New Zealand practicing certificate without the stress of being on call and attending long births. I think I got a bit burnt out last year, so it has been nice to take a break. It is very difficult combining a teaching career and PhD as well as midwifery practice, research and fulfilling the obligations of being a teacher. S0... something has had to give this year. I think I am just not quite ready to plunge back into practice just yet. The moral of the story...balance in life!